Gerry Goldstein

A holiday observance is almost upon us, and in view of testimony about “The Big Lie” at the Jan. 6 hearings, it couldn’t be approaching at a more appropriate time. But I’m not referring to July 4, with all its fanfare and home-grilled Whoppers. I’m talking about July 7, a day set aside for eschewing […]

Decades ago my daughter, Jennifer, brought home from elementary school a hand-made Father’s Day poster on which she had listed what she considered my attributes as a dad. Among these was a statement that summed me up in a fashion others might consider modest. Her assessment: “He is never rotton.” Aside from its rotten spelling, […]

With the pandemic running our lives the past few years, times have been tough for those wanting to marry amid festive ceremony — but a boom is anticipated for 2022, and June should be a busy month at the altar and in the courthouse. What’s the allure of June? Nice weather, of course, but more […]

On Facebook recently, a posting drew thousands of comments when it asked readers to “Kill me with one bad English.” This tortured request came – likely by coincidence – in April, which happens to be National English Language Month, an observance geared toward celebrating our Mother Tongue.  One responder pretty much-summed things up by advising […]

I’d be willing to wager – and I’m optimistic I’d win the bet – that you don’t know March is “National Optimism Month.” Websites galore make reference to it without mentioning how and when this low-profile annual observance got started, but it’s especially appropriate in 2022. So don’t take the pessimistic view that you’ve missed […]

So here we are contemplating the start of a new year, the time for making resolutions, and I’m in firm agreement with the unidentified, cheeky sage who once mused, “I can’t believe it’s been a whole year since I didn’t become a better person.” Getting off the dime is easier said than done, as most of […]

It’s holiday season, and what could be more delightful than savoring Grandma’s chocolate-covered brownies? Helpful spirit that I am (and since Dec. 8 actually happens to be – no lie – National Brownie Day), I’m gifting grandmas everywhere this year with a fail-safe recipe for these treats from an unimpeachable source: the United States Department […]

Here at Shalom Acres, our little hobby farm in Greenville’s Apple Valley, the leaves are mostly fallen, we’ve had a couple of hard frosts, and our once-lush vegetable gardens are barren – a combination that for some might seem depressing. But wait. In all this there is pending rebirth and promise at the darkest time of […]

This is the time of year when traditionally, youngsters contemplate novel ways to be terrifying.  One suspects few could generate the enthusiasm of Exeter’s Lewis E. Peck Jr., whose Halloween hi-jinks were matchless. Of course, he had lots of experience refining his act, since he kept it going well into his sixties. Peck had reasons […]

Three times in recent weeks, a person has been swept from the rocks into perilous waters.

Someone recently posted on Facebook a cartoon in which talking horses were participating in a “Gallop” poll.  As you might imagine, this unleashed a flurry of responses using similar wordplay, many of them certifiable groaners. Among these offenders was mine, but don’t forward it anywhere – it’s not, strictly speaking, what I wish to be known for. […]

I’m wide awake, but am I “woke?” And if I am “woke,” is that good or bad? Such are the dilemmas we face as social media and malicious politics spawn new ways for us to praise and insult one another – sometimes using the same new word for both purposes. Suddenly, we’re awash in coinages, […]

I was saddened to read in the New York Times recently that a canary in the coal mine has died. And a true songbird he was, filling Carnegie Hall in 1966 with his guitar and his blues before chucking his abbreviated fame and embracing the tranquility of rural Perryville in South Kingstown. This was more […]

During many decades in the news business, I wrote and edited more than my share of obituaries, and found the task fulfilling. There’s satisfaction in reviewing a life well (or not so well) lived, and capturing the essence of it as an example for others to either emulate or eschew.   It’s been a while […]

Those of us whose professional tools are limited to words delight in discovering anew one, as I did the other day – and after the year we’ve all been through this onecouldn’t have surfaced at a more opportune time. So allow me to introduce “paraprosdokian,” which, when I stumbled across itdoing some column research, was […]

If there are children in the room as you read this, please shoo them away, because what follows is an intensely personal revelation on an issue they may not be old enough to understand. In the interest of journalistic transparency, here is my confession: I am a sapiosexual. How do I know? Because this new word, […]

“Dear Santa: I’m Jewish, but I really love U. Can U give me a present though. (Please don’t give me coal).” This letter to Santa, which often pops up in anthologies of communication with the jolly old gent, transports me to a long-ago time when as a Jewish kid myself, I also had a question […]

The recent death of New York Yankees hall-of-fame pitcher Whitey Ford provides me personal recollection of how, as children, we choose our role models and heroes. Ford won 236 games, more than any other Yankee, and was a mainstay on legendary teams including the likes of Joe DiMaggio, Mickey Mantle, and Yogi Berra. He shined […]

In these disturbing times it’s comforting to know that one has friends who can be relied on to come through when the chips are down.   In my case, I know I can depend on a stable of folks who have my best interests high on their minds. My special gratitude goes to the likes of […]

The other morning, in step with some cosmic metronome setting the rhythm of the seasons, baby turtles the size of silver dollars wriggled free of the earth outside our front door. Their mother, a crocodilian snapper whose travels I have mentioned before, had presented herself during the first week of June. As she does every year, […]

Since my title on our hobby farm in Rhode Island’s Apple Valley is executive vice president/manure management, I know a thing or two about the production and distribution of raw material. The work, honest and unpretentious, is far more pleasant than you might imagine; in fact, I see a magical aspect to it.   Each […]

It’s at this time of year that Emma Lazarus, whose New Yorker parents maintained a summer home in Newport, gets a lot of publicity for her Statue of Liberty poem and its image of “huddled masses yearning to breathe free.” But she wasn’t the first in her family to write immortal patriotic words, although the […]

In these volatile times when any given day can produce unexpected upheaval, June has delivered its annual reminder to our little hobby farm that dedication and consistency have not abandoned us. As she has for years, our visitor recently appeared right on schedule – in the precise week that tiger lilies send up their graceful […]

See if this snippet of history sounds vaguely familiar to what we’re facing today: Feisty, plain-talking Harry Truman, warned by scientists of his era that a major natural disaster was imminent, rejected their opinions and minimized the threat, hurling insults daily. Despite unmistakable clues that the situation was dire, Truman stood firm in his defiance, […]

As we struggle with the coronavirus, it’s common to hear people say this is our toughest fight since World War II.   Coincidentally, it’s been 75 years since an actual World War II battle played out within sight of our shores, and reminders of it still exist in Newport and off Narragansett. On May 5, […]

Here in Rhode Island’s apple orchard country of Greenville, the honey crisp and macoun trees are bare, but daffodils and tiger lilies are sprouting at our place, thanks to this kindly winter. As recalled recently on this site by news editor Frank Prosnitz, the Blizzard of ’78 is but a distant memory, leaving as it […]

The trade of Mookie Betts to the Los Angeles Dodgers has split Red Sox Nation the way trading Barack Obama for Donald Trump has split America. Many fans are infuriated that the Sox unloaded their superstar a year before his free agency so they could get something in return before he walked away in 2021. […]

February being Black History Month, we might appropriately recall some familiar figures associated with racism: Bugs Bunny, Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, Tom & Jerry, and Popeye. These, and more celluloid friends from our childhood, inhabited cartoons peddling varying degrees of bigotry. Especially in the earlier decades of the last century, some cartoons were so vile […]