So here we are, with the month of Movember just ahead.
And before we give spelling experts angina, let us explain: There is no error in the sentence above.
The “Movember Foundation,” a tax-exempt charity dedicated to spotlighting men’s health issues, urges us males to spend “Movember” growing what it calls a “mo” – a mustache.
When we answer inevitable questions about why we’re nursing a nascent brush, the Foundation advises that we say we’re raising awareness for men’s illnesses, especially prostate and testicular cancer.
While that’s commendable (and might encourage donations to the Foundation), it raises a larger question: Which are among the most notable mustaches ever?
One of the most luxurious, it turns out, spent many years straining soup in Rhode Island.
It enhanced the upper lip of Civil War General (and Rhode Island governor and senator) Ambrose Burnside.
Burnside, who early in his career was assigned to Newport’s Fort Adams and later lived in Bristol and Providence, sported a lavish “mo” that flowed across each cheek and into his abundant mutton chop sideburns. In fact, the term “sideburns” is an inversion of the general’s last name.
The Encyclopedia Britannica lists Burnside’s mustache high among the greatest.
And the American Mustache Institute (yes, that’s a thing) in 2017 inducted Burnside into the International Mustache Hall of Fame (that’s also a thing).
Far unlike Burnside’s was the famous mustache – highly waxed, narrow, and upward-curled, of surrealist artist Salvador Dali. In fact, Dali’s “mo” was nearly indestructible. When his body was exhumed in 2017 for DNA evidence in a paternity suit, 28 years after he died, forensic experts found his mustache intact.
As for contemporary mustaches, one widely cited as the greatest is neither lavish like Burnside’s nor an oddity like Dali’s. It’s the neatly groomed, chevron-shaped “mo” of actor Tom Selleck, which has consistently topped mustache polls (yes, they’re a thing).
Then there’s the famous mustache of Groucho Marx, which began as a glued-on fake for vaudeville, later was smeared on with greasepaint for movies, and by the time he switched to television was real.
Even the Beatles got into the mustache act – Paul McCartney grew one to hide a scar on his upper lip after he fell off a moped in 1965, and the others, in solidarity, grew their own. The foursome posed, mustachioed, for the cover of their iconic album, Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band.
Ironically, a toothbrush-style mustache made famous by two actors who inspired laughs, Charlie Chaplin and Oliver Hardy, fell quickly out of fashion when one appeared later over the upper lip of Adolf Hitler.
Whether villainous or heroic, it’s hard to imagine some familiar figures without their trademark mustaches – the likes of Mark Twain, Theodore Roosevelt, Albert Einstein, Joseph Stalin, Mahatma Gandhi, MLK Jr., and Walter Cronkite.
As for me, I’m well ahead of the game for growing a mustache in “Movember” – I already have one. It doesn’t come close to competing with the extravagant ’stashe sported by Ambrose Burnside, but let it be clearly stated that I didn’t draw it on with greasepaint.
Gerry Goldstein (gerryg76@verizon.net), a frequent contributor, is a retired Providence Journal editor and columnist. The Movember Foundation website is at movember.com.
